YO dude, I need some cash

$420 a month minus $20 insurance... and about $100 on transport. tell me how to survive? and i am only earning that amount for the next 2 years as i will be a Recruit for life lol..

damn... i wish i was working instead of serving the country.

kids these days

"Creativity is just connecting things. When you ask creative people how they did something, they feel a little guilty because they didn't really do it, they just saw something. It seemed obvious to them after a while. That's because they were able to connect experiences they've had and synthesize new things. " - Steve jobs

Steve jobs 1955 - 2011

finally i post something for the big guy, he really revolutionize mobile computing/gaming/net surfing/music and changed the current generation of kids childhood... When i was 3, i only had toy cars on the dining table to keep me entertain, these days, they have ipod/ipad/iphone with videos to do that. whao, where is their childhood going.?

- taken on Nikon 35Ti, 35mm, f/2.8 on FUJICOLOR SUPERIA X-TRA, ISO800. Scanned using my (Skcubrats) Venti with D300s, Sigma 17-50, f/2.8 @ 50mm f/4.

Life is like japanese curry

Yes this is CoCo Ichibanya, but not in singapore, I had it in tokyo back in June,

Yes they just open an outlet at 313 (site: http://www.facebook.com/CoCoICHIBANYAsingapore , coz their main site is in japanese)

BUT HEY that is not the point, Life is really like Curry, but as i dun really like the indian versions, so Life is like Japanese curry, It can be sweet, spicy, salty and tasteless. I tasted them all.

* you know Natsu Matsuri, in the past, the curry don was like the only food there that CANNOT go wrong, this year it was horrible, the curry was tastless, even the rice had more flavors *

anyway You literally can just throw anything into the curry and it will still be taste good. Chicken, beef,pork, prawn, fried oyster, fish, veg,fruits, ICE CREAM. find me one thing that will make japanese curry turn bad?

so ya it is just like life, shit can be thrown at you, but it is up to you to make good. it will only be tasteless if you water it down too much. or not there is always some thing good about it.

*okay another post that dun make sense right* 

I do not know what I am doing.

Okay, at the moment, with army shitting my head.

I kinda just hit a mental roadblock.

i just had 2 plans for working life.
a) go be a visual effects artist, work your way up and out of  SG to UK/JP/US....
or
b) if i cannot survive being a vfx artist, be a photographer... beg to be sign on to ST or something...

but now i am at a point of:
1. my skill set is dropping way too fast.
2. my photos are getting SHITTY...
3. i think my film photos will be nice, coz i dun get to see them anything bigger than 36mmX24mm...
4. I can't even maya or do simple AE stuff at the speed i used to do them ( that is just 9months ago)
5. i am wasting my time at home watching how i met your mother, instead of editing backlogs.
6. I DUN EVEN CARRY MY D300s with me anymore.
7. I only can think of going on holidays, escaping this country... ( on a $400 month allowance ya right)
8. my right arm is hurting again...

i now can't really see what i am going to do after NS... which is weird when I had plan out everything before i entered the army.
whatever it is, this better be like my burnt out/ dry seasons of my old photography days, when i have weeks of dry periods, which was HORRIBLE...

Too much usagi drop

or more like too much emo/slice of life anime/manga/comics/book/dramas/movies/tv shows. but really you got to agree with me that rin is BLOODY cute, that makes you want to have kids... okay not now but like to have a kid like her (if possible)

*finally i have a coloured ver of this shot* (screen cap from the anime, all rights goes to production I.G.)

but that is not the point of this post [yap every photo on this blog is like not really related to the topic, but really i dun have much pics in my database that i can really use]

okay but really i just need to think out loud at least once here, (if u read this, i think we really need to hang out more together, cause really, i starting to feel the strain)

I am really those kind of guys that find most shounen mangas/anime are not my thing, (god knows why are they still so popular with some people of my age group) I really follow seinen and josei stuff. (yes i read shoujo mangas if they are nice).   

take example, this season of anime, i only followed USAGI DROP ( am i turning to a lolicon or i just want to have kids.....) and Kami-sama  no memo-chou ( okay alice is a loli, but the story is good and she is a NEET). the other stuff? i dun seem to be interested at all. * i rather download season 1 to 6 of "How I Met Your Mother" than to watch... mhh tiger and bunny..* i will rather read Oyasumi Pun Pun over one piece or even FMA.*

Just look at the manga collection i have at home. Welcome to the NHK, GENSHIKEN, TRINITY BLOOD, PEACEMAKER, alot of asano inio stuff. Kurosagi Corpse Delivery Service, MPD, March Comes in Like a Lion, hourou musume, ya it is a gloomy lot of manga. but i like it, i grounds me abit and realised, life is not that sucky...

okay who am i kidding, an average joe in a manga can score a girl, and i think i can do the same... think i can hold on to a relationship thanks to a manga, whose characters get together since first year of uni... who am i kidding.

Where we go from here?

I really dunnoe, but i hope it is for a better future.

I been thinking too much these days in camp, and me thinking too much doesn't goes well with the rest of my body and self... usually i will use work to curb this issue, but serving the nation lets you have too much time to think, so ya save me from this place. i need more work to overwork myself.

I wish I knew what am I doing...

God I miss that 700¥ thrift shop along cat street in Tokyo... I wish there are such awesome shop in Singapore.... really salvation army is not a good thrift shop and there are little choices other than that.

Well that is not the point of this post... I dunnoe man... For the pass few weeks , the more I dun do anything... I start to think too much once again...
Thinking of the army.
Thinking of work.
Thinking of my photography...
Thinking about my life...
Thinking about her...

It not that I am having a bad time/ torturing myself. But somehow, I dun feel comfortable when I am happy... *damn I spent too much time emoing*

I am too used to be sad, down, alone. But when the happy moments come by, somehow I will cock things up... I knew shit like this will happen but yet instead of avoiding it, I just drive straight through, telling myself it is okay. But really is it okay? Is it okay for me to go though this torture? Is it okay for me to continue on what I am doing?...

I really dun know.. But whatever it is I will still try to survive. And do what I can do to support you, if you are reading this....

In pain.

Okay no photos coz I am blogging from tekong. It been awhile since I last posted anything here, well a lot of shit/ pain happened but well I kinda expected this to happened to me during this 2 years.

-Skip this post if u dun want to read my bitching. And ah new Photos will be up this weekend -

Well for those that have not been followin me on twitter ( which amazingly I am able to update it) I been diagnosied with a rotoary cuff injury (supraspinatus tendiopathy) on my right shoulder and It seems I torn a tendon. And the fucked up thing, it was due to push up...

Not to mention, I am here in tekong (BMT) for 8 weeks and I injuried myself like in the 2nd week. And from what it seems I will have to recourse BMT in 6 months or so after this tear heal.

Is it fair?, nope, come on I was obviously an unfit soldier thrown into PES B and gotten heat cramps in the first 2 weeks and torn a tendon. What else I need to get for them to realise that there is something wrong with me?

So basically for the last 6 weeks and for the coming 40 plus days I am excused doing nearly everything and wasting my life in tekong. And before this I only went to A&E like once for my stomach infection...

really I never went to the hospital so many times in a month.
Never had 3 different injections in a span of 3 days...
Had like 2 times the number of x-rays that I had my entire life. Or even an ultra sound scan to find that I have a hole in my shoulder...
Oh ya not to mention the amount of painkillers I am on.

Thank goodness, SAF is paying every cent or not I really wonder why the hell am I risking my life for this army. Not that I hate singapore it is just that I am not built to be a soldier. I can help in other ways but not in runnin up and down hills as a riflemen.

Well I better stop bitching and go back filling in my injury report forms which is made so people like me can't filled it in or so SAF will not need to do a single pay out to "minor" cases like mine, they got to be more worried of the SCT that had a 40mm exploded or the other SCT that died in the west.

Who really cares of the recruits at tekong? Well not the MO, I meant look at the flu case...

Going back home

If i considered from the time i went to tokyo, till now. For the past 5 weeks i only slept in my own bed or to be more accurate, was at home for 6 nights... 6 freaking nights... out of 35 days...

I am starting to miss my freedom really much,
i am starting to hate the fact that i have to go back to camp tomorrow evening,
I am already hating some of the guys in my platoon,
not to mention,
I am hating the fact that i am kind of injured thanks to national service.

The doctors says i have a rotator cuff injury on my right shoulder... i dun think it will heal thanks to NS... but this is really a Fuck you to the MO at CMPB, i am really not meant to be a PES B recruit and see what happens. I did nothing wrong except to follow trainings and yet i am injured... Oh wells.

if the specialist say it is really more screwed up than what it is now... i really have nothing to say.

I need some jack....

Okay right jack lives in odaiba....

it is nearly 1 month since tokyo and i am getting used to tekong.... on my next book out will be exactly 1 month since i lost my hair and my pink IC...
Training is not that killer yet but wel nearly after every run i tend to have cramps or heat cramps and my right shoulder is killing me with PAIN...
other than that tekong is quite "fun"

i do miss some stuff like surfing the net, sleeping till 12noon or sleeping at 5am. i miss shooting photos... i miss my mac... i really MISSING alot of anime and manga that i have to batch torrent them EVERY friday night... what else i miss???