it is 2012... now for a look back at 2011!

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first of all it is 2012 so it is a new year... i hope it will be a happy and better than the last year, but well we all know it is just getting worse. *oh spoilt your new year, what do you expect from me being moodless?* anyway my annual look back to the year before...

 

2011: vedict: better than 2010, but more fucked up and alot of shit.

Life is like japanese curry

Yes this is CoCo Ichibanya, but not in singapore, I had it in tokyo back in June,

Yes they just open an outlet at 313 (site: http://www.facebook.com/CoCoICHIBANYAsingapore , coz their main site is in japanese)

BUT HEY that is not the point, Life is really like Curry, but as i dun really like the indian versions, so Life is like Japanese curry, It can be sweet, spicy, salty and tasteless. I tasted them all.

* you know Natsu Matsuri, in the past, the curry don was like the only food there that CANNOT go wrong, this year it was horrible, the curry was tastless, even the rice had more flavors *

anyway You literally can just throw anything into the curry and it will still be taste good. Chicken, beef,pork, prawn, fried oyster, fish, veg,fruits, ICE CREAM. find me one thing that will make japanese curry turn bad?

so ya it is just like life, shit can be thrown at you, but it is up to you to make good. it will only be tasteless if you water it down too much. or not there is always some thing good about it.

*okay another post that dun make sense right* 

Too much usagi drop

or more like too much emo/slice of life anime/manga/comics/book/dramas/movies/tv shows. but really you got to agree with me that rin is BLOODY cute, that makes you want to have kids... okay not now but like to have a kid like her (if possible)

*finally i have a coloured ver of this shot* (screen cap from the anime, all rights goes to production I.G.)

but that is not the point of this post [yap every photo on this blog is like not really related to the topic, but really i dun have much pics in my database that i can really use]

okay but really i just need to think out loud at least once here, (if u read this, i think we really need to hang out more together, cause really, i starting to feel the strain)

I am really those kind of guys that find most shounen mangas/anime are not my thing, (god knows why are they still so popular with some people of my age group) I really follow seinen and josei stuff. (yes i read shoujo mangas if they are nice).   

take example, this season of anime, i only followed USAGI DROP ( am i turning to a lolicon or i just want to have kids.....) and Kami-sama  no memo-chou ( okay alice is a loli, but the story is good and she is a NEET). the other stuff? i dun seem to be interested at all. * i rather download season 1 to 6 of "How I Met Your Mother" than to watch... mhh tiger and bunny..* i will rather read Oyasumi Pun Pun over one piece or even FMA.*

Just look at the manga collection i have at home. Welcome to the NHK, GENSHIKEN, TRINITY BLOOD, PEACEMAKER, alot of asano inio stuff. Kurosagi Corpse Delivery Service, MPD, March Comes in Like a Lion, hourou musume, ya it is a gloomy lot of manga. but i like it, i grounds me abit and realised, life is not that sucky...

okay who am i kidding, an average joe in a manga can score a girl, and i think i can do the same... think i can hold on to a relationship thanks to a manga, whose characters get together since first year of uni... who am i kidding.

Where we go from here?

I really dunnoe, but i hope it is for a better future.

I been thinking too much these days in camp, and me thinking too much doesn't goes well with the rest of my body and self... usually i will use work to curb this issue, but serving the nation lets you have too much time to think, so ya save me from this place. i need more work to overwork myself.

I wish I knew what am I doing...

God I miss that 700¥ thrift shop along cat street in Tokyo... I wish there are such awesome shop in Singapore.... really salvation army is not a good thrift shop and there are little choices other than that.

Well that is not the point of this post... I dunnoe man... For the pass few weeks , the more I dun do anything... I start to think too much once again...
Thinking of the army.
Thinking of work.
Thinking of my photography...
Thinking about my life...
Thinking about her...

It not that I am having a bad time/ torturing myself. But somehow, I dun feel comfortable when I am happy... *damn I spent too much time emoing*

I am too used to be sad, down, alone. But when the happy moments come by, somehow I will cock things up... I knew shit like this will happen but yet instead of avoiding it, I just drive straight through, telling myself it is okay. But really is it okay? Is it okay for me to go though this torture? Is it okay for me to continue on what I am doing?...

I really dun know.. But whatever it is I will still try to survive. And do what I can do to support you, if you are reading this....

In pain.

Okay no photos coz I am blogging from tekong. It been awhile since I last posted anything here, well a lot of shit/ pain happened but well I kinda expected this to happened to me during this 2 years.

-Skip this post if u dun want to read my bitching. And ah new Photos will be up this weekend -

Well for those that have not been followin me on twitter ( which amazingly I am able to update it) I been diagnosied with a rotoary cuff injury (supraspinatus tendiopathy) on my right shoulder and It seems I torn a tendon. And the fucked up thing, it was due to push up...

Not to mention, I am here in tekong (BMT) for 8 weeks and I injuried myself like in the 2nd week. And from what it seems I will have to recourse BMT in 6 months or so after this tear heal.

Is it fair?, nope, come on I was obviously an unfit soldier thrown into PES B and gotten heat cramps in the first 2 weeks and torn a tendon. What else I need to get for them to realise that there is something wrong with me?

So basically for the last 6 weeks and for the coming 40 plus days I am excused doing nearly everything and wasting my life in tekong. And before this I only went to A&E like once for my stomach infection...

really I never went to the hospital so many times in a month.
Never had 3 different injections in a span of 3 days...
Had like 2 times the number of x-rays that I had my entire life. Or even an ultra sound scan to find that I have a hole in my shoulder...
Oh ya not to mention the amount of painkillers I am on.

Thank goodness, SAF is paying every cent or not I really wonder why the hell am I risking my life for this army. Not that I hate singapore it is just that I am not built to be a soldier. I can help in other ways but not in runnin up and down hills as a riflemen.

Well I better stop bitching and go back filling in my injury report forms which is made so people like me can't filled it in or so SAF will not need to do a single pay out to "minor" cases like mine, they got to be more worried of the SCT that had a 40mm exploded or the other SCT that died in the west.

Who really cares of the recruits at tekong? Well not the MO, I meant look at the flu case...

I need some jack....

Okay right jack lives in odaiba....

it is nearly 1 month since tokyo and i am getting used to tekong.... on my next book out will be exactly 1 month since i lost my hair and my pink IC...
Training is not that killer yet but wel nearly after every run i tend to have cramps or heat cramps and my right shoulder is killing me with PAIN...
other than that tekong is quite "fun"

i do miss some stuff like surfing the net, sleeping till 12noon or sleeping at 5am. i miss shooting photos... i miss my mac... i really MISSING alot of anime and manga that i have to batch torrent them EVERY friday night... what else i miss???

botak, fried and tired

(this pic is unrelated to this post)
ps ( i need to upload tokyo pics!)

Well you should realised that the last 17-18 days i was not online, or updating my blogs or even best i have not FLOOD your facebook wall with my twitter updates... well coz i needed to conserve battery AND sadly my camp still do not have the wifi network up yet....

I will be at cosfest this weekend so try to spot me if you can. so good night!. *sleeps*

Potong Pasir.

8 May is the day that Potong Pasir will no longer be an opposition ward. for the past 27 years, Mr Chiam See Tong held the ward. So for all my life i could say, I was living in an Opposition controlled zone of singapore, this tiny town called Potong Pasir, which not many folks know where until it had an train station which openned in 2004 and then the wide coverage of the last election in 2006.

This tiny place, of 17k voters, but 14k plus turn up. [the smallest SMC and least to count] But end up it was the last ward to be announced all thanks to a close battle. In the end PAP won by 114 votes, 0.72% but that was enough.

All i have now is just this 90sec short film i made 77 months ago.

So ya THANK YOU, CHIAM SEE TONG, THANK YOU LINA CHIAM, THANK YOU SPP. You all did well,  43% in toa payoh -bishan and 49.2% in potong pasir is NO easy feat. You all have my respect and i am proud to say that i am a Potong Pasir-ian [is that even a word?]

blog revamped.

well i updated the theme, changed the blog name from what the flush to moodless days. and obviously, the URL changed to blog.togusachan.net.

what else? i think i will blogging more this year thanks to NS and life...

4 years on...

School is starting again... but well what school?

it is the first time after 6+4+4 years of education, that well i have no classes.

well but really 4 years ago around this time of the year. I just entered Ngee Ann poly, right after some things happened, life was crappy, my photographs were shitty.  and after some digging earlier, i dun even have a single folder of photos from Jan 2007 to early April 07. <strike> maybe i deleted all the photos from that time </strike>

Slice of life

Slice of life anime, manga or even movies gets to me... Really. Sometimes I wonder is my life so eventful? Why do all these shit ( in the manga/movies/stories) happens to me too...

In some, I felt like it will happen to be soon.

I created a club like Genshiken. My past few years sound like I copied the script of 500 days of summer. Solanin reminds me of the shit that is going to happen to me... Hourou musuko reminds me of something in the past that I forgot...

Well no wonder they are categorize them as slice of life. Coz it looks like some are a slice of mine... And yours and the author...

Slice of life

Slice of life anime, manga or even movies gets to me... Really. Sometimes I wonder is my life so eventful? Why do all these shit ( in the manga/movies/stories) happens to me too...

In some, I felt like it will happen to be soon.

I created a club like Genshiken. My past few years sound like I copied the script of 500 days of summer. Solanin reminds me of the shit that is going to happen to me... Hourou musuko reminds me of something in the past that I forgot...

Well no wonder they are categorize them as slice of life. Coz it looks like some are a slice of mine... And yours and the author...

what is after this?

With production deadline looming over our heads, it is also the end of my poly life. 4 years in NP, where do I go after this? Well Yes I still got to serve my country for the next 2 years, but where do I go after it? Go straight into industry? Or go to uni? What uni? What course? What country? Where got the money?

If I am going straight into the industry, I really need to build my portfolio in NS. Wait that applies to going to uni too. For industry I should try my luck for the Jedi program at ILM or try my luck at double neg and hope they send me to uk for a year. but what if both i fail to get in? Work for a local production house? Be a freelance ?

If I am going to uni, it is another headache all together. Other than NTU, the other places dun really have the degree I am looking for locally. Wait even NTU's ADM dun have the course... If I manage to get into NTU, I guess I will be applying for photography instead of filming or visual effects.

If i am able to get the money or some form of scholarship ( at least $100k ++) I will try for UK uni. 2 years at NFTS or met film school. Or next is HK or aus uni. Canada and USA are not in my mind at the moment. But maybe I should since the usd is getting way too low comparing to the yen and aus dollar...

Whatever path I am heading to. I will be behind a computer cursing at Maya. Crashing nuke, photoshopping something or worse producing a film that I dun want to do....

what is after this?

With production deadline looming over our heads, it is also the end of my poly life. 4 years in NP, where do I go after this? Well Yes I still got to serve my country for the next 2 years, but where do I go after it? Go straight into industry? Or go to uni? What uni? What course? What country? Where got the money?

If I am going straight into the industry, I really need to build my portfolio in NS. Wait that applies to going to uni too. For industry I should try my luck for the Jedi program at ILM or try my luck at double neg and hope they send me to uk for a year. but what if both i fail to get in? Work for a local production house? Be a freelance ?

If I am going to uni, it is another headache all together. Other than NTU, the other places dun really have the degree I am looking for locally. Wait even NTU's ADM dun have the course... If I manage to get into NTU, I guess I will be applying for photography instead of filming or visual effects.

If i am able to get the money or some form of scholarship ( at least $100k ++) I will try for UK uni. 2 years at NFTS or met film school. Or next is HK or aus uni. Canada and USA are not in my mind at the moment. But maybe I should since the usd is getting way too low comparing to the yen and aus dollar...

Whatever path I am heading to. I will be behind a computer cursing at Maya. Crashing nuke, photoshopping something or worse producing a film that I dun want to do....

Tired

With 2011 coming along in 84 hours and poly life coming to an end in less than 2 months...

I really wonder am I made out to survive this industry. Looking at alot of other people portfolio, mine really do look crappy. I am not the best nor the worse. I am just another normal hardworking guy that may end up getting burnt out. Is this what I really want?

I really dunnoe. I really too tired to think about the future, that I wish I can live in the present. But then the past tend to come back and haunt me...

Well what a way to end the not so great year of 2010.

moodless night

How to say good bye by Paul Tiernan


Living isn't quite the same
You said to me, it's runnin' away.
If you're scared or tired of what you're scared of
Why should you stay
You love to say goodbye
And always counted all the time
'til he was free
to get up and leave
to learn how to breathe
again...

Slippin' out to have a cigarette
with someone else that he'd never met
Ask her if by the way would you like to
run away and try to forget
Just not to stay
To leave without saying why

To get up and go
To catch the last train
To get in some car and drive out again
To never come back this way
Left to say:

goodbye
so long
farewell
ovwar

goodbye
so long
farewell
ovwuar

--------------------

is it farewell?

REPOST: Vivienne Westwood's Anglomania A/W 09/10 collection.

Another Repost from moodless days.

Some photos that i took during the fashion show.

It was really an eye openner for me as a virgin fashion show goer . Now i hope that there will Comme des Garçons show next year... their collection especially the jackets is what i really love....

End of part 1 of photos.

Part 2 will be up another time when i am free.

You can check more photos taken at audi fashion fest @ lenne's http://dearophelia.wordpress.com/

This week i have a iphone TVC to film once i complete pre-production papers.

Re-post: D90

A repost from moodlessdays.wordpress.com



I did not buy it. but well i rented one from The Camera Rental Centre at south bridge road.



The D90 comes with 2 Charged Batt, Charger, 4GB SD card for $45.


I also rented a AF-D 50mm f/1.4 lens. well it was not a disappointment, but i now know why you use lights to light up a model instead of using the aperture. The lens was great when the place is nicely lit, but in backlight, it was horrible till it was like at f/2.8...

Photos from the shoot will be up soon.