is it too much?

to ask for my dream girl to be like YUI??? not YUI from K-on! but YUI the singer... I am too picky i guess...

also i realised, due to i am twitting too much. my blog post cannot seem to go for more than 140 characters if i am talking about one topic. Paragraphing new post is getting really really hard and i dun think i have much to say. oh wells time to sleep

moodless night

How to say good bye by Paul Tiernan


Living isn't quite the same
You said to me, it's runnin' away.
If you're scared or tired of what you're scared of
Why should you stay
You love to say goodbye
And always counted all the time
'til he was free
to get up and leave
to learn how to breathe
again...

Slippin' out to have a cigarette
with someone else that he'd never met
Ask her if by the way would you like to
run away and try to forget
Just not to stay
To leave without saying why

To get up and go
To catch the last train
To get in some car and drive out again
To never come back this way
Left to say:

goodbye
so long
farewell
ovwar

goodbye
so long
farewell
ovwuar

--------------------

is it farewell?

so really all these 4 years...

we finally coming to the breaking point is it?

of all things you told the wrong person. really.

well life have to go on and you stop ignoring me  . things cannot get patch up by ignoring.

my schedule for the next few days

wednesday: 
1pm, be in NP, hope avid lab empty.
4pm, actual booking starts
4.30pm, collect cam from cage.
6pm, avid booking ends...

thursday:
10am in NP, pack photog room
2pm need to rush to zhao wei films.
3.30pm interview.
5pm rush to meet sponser.
6pm done?

friday:
10am in NP, move stuff from photog room to  new storage place.
5pm, avid booking again
6pm get kick out?

saturday?
go see see the mascot parade?
NEED to go to kino...  MPD and kurosaki corpses sevrices vol 9 are out!!!!
cut hair...
edit interview footage.

sunday.
Finish up production papers
finish up interview footage.

monday:
class at 2pm
avid at 6pm.

-normal day cycle returns-

life goes on... without me..

why? coz i am always left out of the picture...
hated to be casted one side while i do things for you people, then left to be forgotten till i am needed again...

oh wells it got to be karma for having a good life, with no real shit really happening...

fuck you maya...

really fuck you...

i command+S every time and yet, for the last 6hours, you never save. fuck you... now i am screwed. big time...

maya maya maya

really...

now i know why they name maya, maya. If it was a name like james, or 3D program A...

you cannot say fuck james when it crashes.. 
you also cannot say screw 3Dprogram when the backups disappears...

at least when u say fuck/screw/shit maya... it still sound natural...

Haruhi IS BACK

the NEW ep of haruhi was just release today. It is not a troll but i still cannot find raws of it so ya. it is a waiting game...

and GG got "hacked" an sos-dan logo is on it...

When you are pissed, you give me shit.

When i am pissed, you fucking ignore me. FUCK YOU OKAY.

YOU THINK THAT YOU ARE ALL UP THERE WITH ENLIGHTMENT. Girl guess what you do not have. If you really did do what you told me. You won't be saying all those stuff and not try to explain. And as you say you do try to change, but did you really change?

I see none of it. and you See none of mine. SO STOP TELLING ME TO SELF-REFLECT.
I CAN'T SELF-REFLECT by myself as i see myself as right... always right... I need to tell my issues to someone so they can tell me it is wrong. I need someone to tell me that is wrong with me.

I know that i am selfish. I dun care for others. i am an ass when i am working. i am stubborn to the core. I am a pessimist. I have time management problem. I am untidy. I am demanding. I think highly of myself.

for some i have reasons be that way.
1. Being selfish: imagine after spending 14 years of being bullied coz you are a nice guy. Won't you want to be selfish?

2. I dun care for others: Why should i care for people that step over me and treat me like shit, when they are no better than me? And really i dun do not care all the times. It is that my first reaction is to ignore.

3. Ya i am an ass: look, when we are doing the same work, and we are taught in the same class. You should be able to understand what is going on. IF you dunnoe what shit is going on. dun ask me, ask the lecturer. And we have a dateline you know, EVERY TIME I help you it is a loss to me, and a gain for you.

4. stubborness: I have an idea, you ask me for it, i tell you it, You tell me you like it, but you want to chance it, You chance a litte of it and say it is you idea. NO IT IS MY IDEA. then there is the YOU DUN LIKE IT. but YOU end up creating an IDEA that is LIKE my idea and you use it. Of course i disagree and rather my OWN.

5. pessimist: what can go wrong will go wrong. Nothing in this world really go your way. if i was a optimist, I would be ignore alot of shits that i need for deciding.

6. Time managment.: i need to cut my work load... and stop wasting time like on this blog.

7. Untidy: well thanks to my mom. she pack too nice that i find it easier to work in a mess.

8. demanding: if i dun have it my way, it is not my way. yesh my way sound like a shitty way, but sometimes it is now.

9. thinking high of myself: i dunnoe how it got by.

well i am tired so i am going to sleep... will continue this end later.

As real as it fucking gets

You will need a big space to work on a REAL photoshop...



and it is really real -> http://www.flickr.com/photos/18697966@N00/sets/72157608377333404/detail/
go to the high res one and view it. It looks CG when small coz well sharpen image looked CG...