Some days I feel like shit,
Some days I wanna quit, and just be normal for a bit,
i really wish i can just be a normal kid, have a normal life. but hell, i dun have one, but technically, it looks normal from the outside, i dun really excel at all. i am not an outstanding person. i look perfectly normal from the outside. but haiz... it is not normal.
when u have parents that dun like go for gathering, dun like to mix with people they dun know. you know that you dun have a normal life, come on i am 17, most parents dun mind the kid to have their own room, if there is a room in the house that is not that used. and my parents give me the most crap and shit reasons not to use my study room as my room, when most of the stuff in it are mine. okay i will state it here today, this is my say, i will turn that study room of mine in to my bed room by the end of this year, no matter what they say.
okay i am quite worked up on this crap cause of this morning and yesterday... being the target that gets blame / start the argument / topic of argument from my parents... i got worked up by it that i just stood up from the dinning table and had some fight with my dad....
come on dun say that i sleeping around, i am your freaking son. it is like saying that i am a gigolo.. i dun even have a girlfriend, like i can sleep around... girls like hot guys, i am a freaking geek, not handsome at all, i am not smart, i am not outstanding, i am, well perfectly average.
i really that bad in life,
1 girl dump me after a week, with the crappiest dump line i ever heard from anywhere....
another told me it depends....
another just rejected me and only contact me when she wants to go out or need help...
and one just did not gave a reason, an answer or reply, she just let go. block me on msn, i guess she would block my phone number is she know how to.... lucky i did not teach her how. I really thought we can last, but i guess it happened to fast....
i am those guys that tend to go for girls that i like, if i dun have the feeling, i am not interested in that girl. [ that is how i rejected 2]... maybe i think too much of love at first sight... i should move away from that idea...
well and someone have a great saying to me, " go and get a girlfriend.." halo ms, ain't you the perfect candidate? haiz if do read this, go and get a boyfriend, you got to learn not to toy with too many guys hearts, although the major one you toy with was that guy...
a relationship is not a one way street, it is a busy 4 lane expressway. after that girl, i should have known, but it was still one way, but the arrow was pointing to her. i fell for her but nothing much came back,except when she was down...
i still cannot forget... i cannot take alcohol as it affects my painkillers and and i get drunk too fast now, [ my alcohol torrence is getting lower to now, 1.5 cups of the tall sake cup]. it is screwed.
i just want to get over this... and listen to that someone, get a girlfriend.
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Yeah here we go for the hundredth time
Hand grenade pins in every line
Throw 'em up and let something shine
Going out of my fucking mind
Filthy mouth, no excuse
Find a new place to hang this noose
String me up from atop these roofs
Knot it tight so i won't get loose
Truth is you can stop and stare
Run myself out and no one cares
Dug the trench out laid down there
With a shovel up out of reach somewhere
Yeah, someone pour it in
Make it a dirt dance floor again
Say your prayers and stomp it out
When they bring that chorus in
[Chorus]
I bleed it out digging deeper
Just to throw it away
I bleed it out digging deeper
Just to throw it away
I bleed it out digging deeper
Just to throw it away
Just to throw it away
Just to throw it away
I bleed it out
[End Chorus]
Go stop the show
Choppy words and a sloppy flow
Shotgun opera lock and load
Cock it back and then watch it go
Mama help me I've been cursed
Death is rolling in every verse
Candy paint on his brand new hearse
Can't contain him he knows he works
Fuck this hurts I won't lie
Doesn't matter how hard I try
Half the words don't mean a thing
And I know that I wont be satisfied
So why try ignoring him
Make it a dirt dance floor again
Say your prayers and stomp it out
When they bring that chorus in
[Chorus]
I bleed it out digging deeper
Just to throw it away
I bleed it out digging deeper
Just to throw it away
I bleed it out digging deeper
Just to throw it away
Just to throw it away
Just to throw it away
I bleed it out
I've opened up these scars
I'll make you face this
I pull myself apart
I'll make you, face, this, now!!!!
[Chorus]
I bleed it out digging deeper
Just to throw it away
I bleed it out digging deeper
Just to throw it away
I bleed it out digging deeper
Just to throw it away
Just to throw it away
Just to throw it away
I bleed it out digging deeper
Just to throw it away
I bleed it out digging deeper
Just to throw it away
I bleed it out digging deeper
Just to throw it away
Just to throw it away
Just to throw it away
I bleed it out
I bleed it out
I bleed it out
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