like i need a stupid moron consultor [a sales-man in wolf clothes] to tell me to join his fucked up courses... and waste my parents money... dumb parents... invite him over to get con and believe in what he saying...
STUPID!!!
baka!
come on!! spend 4.5k for 15 sundays from 10am to 5pm to go for that stupid course, i not going to waste my sundays! for what like hell i will go!
okay... i know it will be for my wellbeing... for the good for me... but have they look at their bank account? credit card statement? the amount of stocks left? and their cpf? they know it... that it is not enough to survive for them... and not enough to send my bro to a uni... i let him have a better life... he is smarter than me... he is... but he thinks he is dumb coz he dun have a god damn logic and not even streetwise...
man i screwed up my life since pri 2,from 4th class and drop to worse em2 one in p5... i was screwed up since then.... screwed to the core... just because i mess up and failed my chinese... i was kick to the worse... just because of my stupid chinese, and like i never put an effort in it... it is depressing coz... i scored like A for sci and math and B for eng and still kick to the bottom... and the depressing life starts...
people from the higher up class starts to stay away from me.... coz i was a fallen... what was up with those fucking EM1 students in the past? just becoz they are in EM1 the gave up friendships coz i crashed? fuck those bastards... lucky i dun need to see their elitist face anymore... since psle results...
then the more screw up life appeared, i got fucking shit nightmare of getting in to normal and to be a loner... i was really god damn scared till the point i did not sleep on the day before i find out my class posting... [blame me... my results slip said express or Norm[A]]... got into a class.... with little frens i knew...[ lost most in pri 5... and my best fren in the 2nd top class..]...
lonely in sec 1... screwed by the bullies... forced given class chairman post so the bullies can be kings... i nearly wanted to jump... from the 4th floor... cross over the railings... twice.. some classmates and my best fren[who turned into my boss in sec 3.] helped to get me out of that fucked up life for a while...
things got okay... for a while thanks to my seniors but it crashed again last year... when my bloody parents started worrying too much.... so late??? didn't they know i had these prbs since like pri 2??? i was emo for a fucking long time.... that is y i am a crybaby....
it took them what? 8 years? to realised i got prbs? fine i dun show it at home in front of them cause i dun want to trouble them.... for what i should worry them when they have worse problems to think about...
so now then my parents know i got prb... and they want to take me away from the things that are not the main cost of the problems, but my pillars to survive... pull me out of robotics?
dun alot me to go out?
cut my internet?
take my laptop?
not allowing me to use the study as my own room... when more than half of the place is my things... -.-
FUCK u stupid life.
They killed my idea of doing a shirt-printing biz... it is not that i asking them for money to start it... i going to use my own saving which she drains it.... -.-
fucked up life won't u just died? and leave me in peace? But by then i am dead and resting in peace... or is there no heaven or hell? we just die... our souls just dissappear... there is no soul society. no shinigami. no gods.
just like ryuuk said." you dun go to heaven or hell. u just die."
night...
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